I stumbled across a video today that stunned me—an echo in time. As I watched my recently passed, beloved 19-year-old cat, Aubry, and listened to the background soundtrack of an ordinary day in my life from 2015, a message began to come through that I recognized was from him. A recent traumatic experience that landed … Continue reading The Weight of Grief and the Depth of Love
Tag: Cptsd
Looking In The Rear-View Mirror
Something Wicked This Way Comes I found this picture of myself from twelve years ago. It jarred me. I think I recognized something that I was unable to see at that time. ( in addition to wow! talk about a good hair day! ) As a survivor of Complex PTSD I have lived my entire … Continue reading Looking In The Rear-View Mirror
WHEN THERAPY IS RE-TRAUMATIZING
I did not wake up intending to write this today. As a matter of fact, I sat down to write about something completely different that has been begging for release, something much more uplifting, as it deals with the little miracles I have been uncovering in the midst of my trauma recovery. This though... Blindsided. … Continue reading WHEN THERAPY IS RE-TRAUMATIZING
Was As If I Were; Were As If I Was
Are you running from shadows that are not even your own, but instead are being projected onto you from collective negative energies, long past? Where does one even begin to suspect that such a thing is occurring? I feel a divine breakthrough transpired to open my eyes to this because my brain has been at … Continue reading Was As If I Were; Were As If I Was
Writing From The WOMB
The greatest thing about blogging is that there is no pressure. It was the best step for me as a longtime journal writer who never wrote continuously in one at a time, but several. One journal may contain a small period of time, but from beginning to end it can span a decade or more. … Continue reading Writing From The WOMB
The Elephant In The Room Is At Your Feet
I found this most delightful treasure while beach combing in the Outer Banks of North Carolina. It was a glorious morning and you can't imagine the joy this brought me. God is said, in the Bible, to know exactly how many hairs are on our head. I don't doubt it. I mean, He IS all-knowing … Continue reading The Elephant In The Room Is At Your Feet
Honey; Weaving A Tapestry of Healing Out of the Threads That Connect the Past to the Present
About twenty three years ago, I worked as a horse trainer apprentice and barn manager at a Quarter Horse farm. I had answered a classified ad in the paper after my job as lead singer in a house band aboard a dinner cruise ship had just ended. I went from dressing fancy six nights a … Continue reading Honey; Weaving A Tapestry of Healing Out of the Threads That Connect the Past to the Present
Confronting My Abuser Before God and All the Patrons at Irwin’s Lunch Counter
"Let's leave Jesus out of this, 'cause me and Jesus are good. "
And he has the gall to ask me if I "really wanna go there?"
Oh yes, I really do, and I just did.
Naked In The Grocery Store
Spilling my guts out in near-gritty detail was like going through hard labor and ending up having to get an emergency c-section. I have been recovering ever since. I had a professor in college whose work I loved, and who I enjoyed, partially because of his laid-back yet engaging way of teaching, (Printmaking and Design) … Continue reading Naked In The Grocery Store
It’s Like This
Are you stuck having "one of those days" ? I'm talking you feel splayed out, face down, overwhelmed, every single day? Let me ask you another question... Have you felt hopeless and paralyzed for so long that you cannot even remember the last time you were at peace with your life and the choices you make? Oh … Continue reading It’s Like This
Not So Swell at The Bottom of The Well
Depression is often like shadow boxing; it creeps up on me, and lingers just out of site, but I know there is a menacing presence from which I must defend myself. This is a shadow that can manifest on the cloudiest of days while disappearing altogether when it's sunny. It plays tricks like that, making … Continue reading Not So Swell at The Bottom of The Well
